How do you love and value yourself? Low self-esteem, the silent saboteur

EFT Tapping For Self Esteem

Your self esteem and self worth have an impact on how you see and treat yourself in everyday life. Low self-esteem can be caused by a variety of factors, but there are techniques to overcome it, one of which is EFT. EFT Tapping Therapy has been shown to be a successful alternative therapy for boosting self-confidence and self-trust in people.

Have you ever experienced that time, when nothing goes your way? Relationships get sour, the boss is always breathing down your neck, and you don't feel good about yourself and just want to give it all up?

We begin to believe that we aren't worthy enough, we don't deserve the success and recognition from others, we aren't capable enough to make a difference in people’s lives as well as your own.

Even if you have a world class education, boast-worthy titles, and achievements at work, you will never be pleased with the validation and acknowledgment you receive from the outside world unless and until you appreciate yourself and recognise and celebrate your achievements.

The term "self-esteem" refers to a person's entire sense of worth. It's essentially your assessment of yourself. It can refer to a variety of things, including your sense of self-worth, self-assurance, sentiments of competence, and feelings of belonging. It is vital in a multitude of aspects of life, which is why poor self-esteem can be such a major issue.

Self-esteem entails believing in yourself and respecting your own thoughts, feelings, opinions, interests, and ambitions, as well as believing you deserve love.

The chances are there are some self- sabotaging programs running in your consciousness, without even you even knowing it, when you don't appreciate and love yourself. 

One of these silent saboteurs are low self-esteem or low self- love.

   WHAT IS LOW SELF ESTEEM?

When someone has low self-esteem, they are unsure of who they are and what they can accomplish. They frequently feel incapable, neglected, or insufficient. People who have low self-esteem are always worried about making errors or disappointing others.

Self-esteem difficulties can have a severe impact on your health as well as your personal and professional connections.

Low self-esteem can arise from many different reasons, family conditioning, past hurt, anger failures, including your genes, how and where you grew up, and other life circumstances and much more. Surprisingly most of the people going through low self esteem issues don't even realize it until there is professional intervention.

   SIGNS OF LOW SELF ESTEEM

Your own mental condition is a big contributor to low self-esteem. Even if there is evidence to the contrary, your inner voice, or thoughts in your head, can be constantly telling you that you are not good enough or worth anything. Negative thinking is linked to low self-worth and self-esteem in general.

There are a number of indicators that you or someone you know may be suffering from low self-esteem. These are some of the signs of low self-esteem:

• Social withdrawal: Low self-esteem manifests itself in the refusal to attend a party or meet up with friends, the cancellation of arranged plans at the last minute, and a general dislike of being around others. You may have no desire to have a conversation or talk about your life because it will only serve to worsen your despair and anxiety.
• Self doubt and worry: People with poor self-worth often worry that they've made the wrong option even after they've made it. They distrust their own judgments and are more likely to listen to what others have to say rather than sticking to their guns. This can lead to a lot of second-guessing and self-doubt, making it difficult for people with low self-esteem to make important life decisions.
• Criticism sensitivity:  If you have a low self-esteem, you may be more sensitive to criticism, whether it comes from others or from yourself. You simply perceive it as a confirmation of your inadequacies and that you are incapable of doing anything correctly.
• Negative self-talk: People with low self-esteem tend to concentrate on their defects rather than their virtues. They constantly seem to have something terrible to say about themselves, rather than building themselves up with good self-talk. When things go wrong, they blame themselves and always find fault with some aspect of themselves, whether it's their appearance, personality, or abilities (1).

I'm pretty sure you've been able to pinpoint the moments when your self-esteem was been damaged. You've become more conscious of how and why you have those sentiments and ideas regarding those experiences. You can now take a step back and examine your thoughts and feelings. You now have the ability to alter your thinking habits in order to boost your self-esteem.

   WAYS TO OVERCOME LOW SELF ESTEEM

If you're experiencing low self-esteem, there are some things you can do to help yourself feel better. These are some of the approaches:

• Forgive yourself: It is critical to learn how to forgive yourself and move on if you have a tendency to dwell on your mistakes or shortcomings. This will help you focus on the things you can improve in the future rather than the things that have gone wrong in the past.
• Value yourself: Spend some time reflecting on what you've accomplished and what you're proud of. Allow yourself to value your worth and talents without creating comparisons.
• Stay in touch with yourself: By helping you to halt the autopilot thinking and behaviour that keeps you jumping to please others without considering your own needs, mindfulness can help you establish a sense of connection to yourself and minimise your people-pleasing tendencies.
• Self-compassion is important: You, like everyone else, are deserving of love. Self-compassion simply entails giving oneself the love, security, and acceptance that you require (2).
• Emotional Freedom Techniques: EFT Tapping is a mind-body method that helps in the working of low self-esteem by assessing and resolving the underlying cause of the emotions. Using Emotional Freedom Techniques is one way to figure out what's holding you back. EFT Tapping gets to the root of your fear, or whatever is preventing you from moving forward, and removes it.

The first time I encountered low self-esteem issues within myself, my first reaction was - "But I do love and value myself". It was only through some really deep work through Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), I became aware of how I really let myself get pulled deeper and deeper and disconnected from myself.

I used to think that loving myself was shopping. Oh boy! I was wrong. At the EFT Practitioner Training in Mumbai, I realized that all of the needless shopping was only my way of dealing with my low self-esteem. Unfortunately, it did help me overcome what was really at the root of it all.

At the EFT Practitioner Training, I was able to get to the root of all of the layers of unwanted emotions and eliminate them from there. The result - All the unnecessary shopping stopped. What was even more amazing was that I could see my future clearly, my relationships improved and I saw an overall improvement in the quality of my life.

For those new to EFT, it is also known as Tapping Therapy, which combines tapping on acupressure points while saying statements out loud to accept situations. 

If you would like to experience the power of EFT Tapping first hand, just download the EFT Tapping Booklet below.

   EFT TAPPING FOR LOW SELF ESTEEM

EFT Tapping for low self esteem is a clinically proven therapeutic method.  Since people only get this feeling every now and then, tapping is highly helpful at reducing tension and increasing confidence when they are feeling low and unloved.

EFT Tapping is also simple to use and has a long-term effect.

This approach also assists you in becoming more aware of your feelings and emotions, as well as removing negativity, low confidence, and low self-esteem from your body and mind.

The tapping sequence for low self esteem is listed below.

Round 1:

Karate Chop: Even though I have low confidence in myself, I love and accept myself.(3 times).

Eyebrow: I have low confidence in myself...

Side Of The Eye: In everything I do.

Under The Eye: I just cannot trust.

Under The Nose: I'm so afraid.

Chin: Am I worthy of the success?

Collarbone: I don’t think I deserve success.

Under The Arm: I don’t know how to deal with this low self esteem.

Thumb: I’m scared everytime I try to do something with my life.

Index Finger: I doubt myself.

Middle Finger: I feel others doubt me too.

Little Finger: I don’t think I deserve success.

Closing Sequence (Karate Chop): Even though I have low confidence in myself, I am open to the possibility of trusting myself. I love and accept myself.

Breathe in and out and take a sip of water

Round 2:

Karate Chop: Even though I don't value my capabilities and I don’t think I deserve success. Maybe I underestimate myself. I love a accept myself (3 times).

Eyebrow:  I have low confidence in myself.

Side Of The Eye: I under-estimate myself.

Under The Eye: I just cannot trust my abilities.

Under The Nose: Maybe someone did not trust me before.

Chin: And I accepted that persons mistrust.

Collarbone: I believed this lie.

Under The Arm: That I am not capable.

Thumb: That I cannot do it.

Index Finger: I have accepted I am worthless and unlovable.

Middle Finger: Absolutely worthless.

Little Finger: That I judge myself.

Top Of The Head: I choose to breathe now and accept that I am worthy (breathe in and out while tapping).

Closing Sequence (Karate Chop): Even though I don't value my capabilities and I don’t think I deserve success. Suppose somehow I could find the confidence to believe that I am worthy of success.

Breathe in and out and take a sip of water

Round 3:

Karate Chop: Even though I am learning to trust myself more, I love and accept myself.

Eyebrow: I am learning to trust myself more.

Side Of The Eye: I love myself more.

Under The Eye: I am non-judgemental of myself.

Under The Nose: I am non-judgemental of others.

Collarbone: What if I could find the confidence?

Under The Arm: What if I could trust and love my self more?

Thumb: I can trust my abilities now.

Index Finger: It is safe for me to trust myself.

Middle Finger: I can do what I decide to.

Little Finger: It's okay to trust myself

Top Of The Head: Suppose somehow I find the confidence to trust myself and my abilities. I am grateful for all the love I give myself.

Closing Sequence (Karate Chop): Even though I am doubtful of my abilities, I am open to the possibility of taking help and support in completing my tasks. I love and accept myself completely.

Breathe in and out and take a sip of water

Round 4:

Karate Chop: Even though it’s easier to trust myself and my abilities now, I whole heartedly love and accept myself.

Eyebrow: I am allowing myself to remove this limiting belief.

Side Of The Eye: That I am not worthy.

Under The Eye: That I cannot be successful.

Under The Nose: That I will be judged.

Chin: By myself and others.

Collarbone: Even if I fail.

Under The Arm: That is just learning.

Thumb: It does not define who I am.

Index Finger: It does not define my capabilities.

Middle Finger: I can start over.

Little Finger: I can achieve success.

Top Of The Head: I love myself for being confident and for trusting myself.

Closing Sequence (Karate Chop): Even though I doubted myself and my capabilities, that was then and this is now, I am grateful for being successful. I am grateful for having confidence. I deeply and completely love and accept and value myself.

Breathe in and out and take a sip of water

   DOES EFT TAPPING FOR LOW SELF ESTEEM REALLY WORK?

One of the stories that I came across at the EFT Practitioner Training never ceases to amaze me is that of Smita Pande.

Here's what she had to say, “I have had a good life, however, I never knew what genuine happiness actually is. The only thing I wanted to do in life was to recognise my potential. When the EFT Practitioner Training ended, I sensed a complete emotional transformation, finally experiencing the true happiness. Right after the workshop, I chose a different road for my life. This ‘new journey’ was the one taken to discover myself. My first step was to do something of my own, so I decided to become a counselor. 

I felt confident and empowered as these baby steps progressively matured and expanded. I feel blessed that I followed EFT as a tool that appease all the life challenges I faced. Physically and emotionally, I feel gratitude for everything I have which has helped me achieve peace and happiness from deep within. I get tremendous joy in helping my family, friends and clients by releasing their negative emotions and making them feel empowered and happy,”  

In closing, although it may not seem like much at the onset, low self-esteem issues can be debilitating to the overall quality of your life, and may arise at any time. It doesn't take a lot to start blaming and undervaluing yourself.

What is important is that you are able to pull yourself out of it with the right tools. You can start uncovering all your buried emotions by using EFT.

It may take some time and work to change your perspective of yourself, but you may learn to see and love yourself for who you are over time.

Keep Tapping!

Love,

Donita and Team Vitality

P.S. Want to discover if EFT Tapping is right for you? Book a Complimentary Discovery Call. 

In summary, people mistake temporary objects as a means of self love. However, self love and self esteem are influenced by the thoughts and feelings we carry within ourselves. Identifying our potential and accepting ourselves is the objective we should aim for. EFT is the best technique to give you an insight into your thoughts and limiting beliefs that are stopping you from achieving greatness.

References: 

1. https://www.verywellmind.com/signs-of-low-self-esteem-5185978 

2. https://www.psychologies.co.uk/10-ways-overcome-low-self-esteem 

Disclaimer: The information on this website is purely for educational purposes and does not in any way replace the requirement for medical and psychological diagnosis and treatment. Please do seek professional medical and psychological diagnosis and advice for all medical and mental health conditions. It is advised to always book any consultations with qualified professionals.

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