Surrogate Tapping For My Teenage Son

In this article, you will learn about what surrogate tapping is, my story about how I used surrogate tapping on my son, and the if this tapping method really works. 

Surrogate Tapping is an exciting element of EFT Tapping which lets you tap on yourself for another person's issue, whether or not they are present.

Has your teenage son or daughter ever shut down on you? Mine had, and it can get very frustrating.

Tapping aka Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) has help me feel calmer. My son saw me tapping and tried to imitate me.

Phew! I achieved a milestone.

What’s more after just two days, he shared his feelings with me.

I was now aware of his ups and downs, his fears, his expectations he had of himself and others, his struggle to overcome his issues.

The coach in me wanted to advise him and teach him EFT. However he was not ready! Another road block.

I then decided to try surrogate tapping which is super effective, especially if you want to work on children or adults that are closed up.

And I must say, it turned out to work so good for me!

WHAT IS SURROGATE TAPPING?

Often times, we think about our loving friends, family members, and every amazing human being and how we wish for their prosperous and happy life. 

Have you ever experienced thoughts like this? You have, of course, because you care about the people you love.

You're on the cutting edge of discovering information that can alter people's lives, and all you want is for more people to know about it, to make better decisions, and to experience greater pleasure, joy, health, and abundance. 

Surrogate EFT Tapping is the art and science of applying the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) on your own tapping points to help someone else with their problems.

Surrogate EFT can be used by anyone, including babies, small kids, relatives, individuals with dementia, the physically disabled, or an acquaintance, and those who are too ill to tap on or for themselves.

It can also be used on pets or plants. Many people have strong emotional attachments to their pets and plants.

Surrogate Tapping is a technique in which you put yourself in the shoes of another person, visualising yourself in the same situation as them, then tapping on yourself on their behalf.

The only need for acting as a surrogate and performing Surrogate EFT Tapping is that you realise your spiritual connection and oneness with the person you are substituting for and/or tapping for.

Surrogate work is not an artistic endeavour. It's all about getting in touch with a person's actual feelings. 

Surrogate work is, in essence, unseen work performed from a place of unconditional love and trust. In some ways, you and they are the same person.

The most crucial element of surrogate tapping- the phase that most people rush through or skip- is to tap on yourself first and foremost for any feelings, worries or negative beliefs you have about the issue.

If your mental block is free, the surrogate tapping is more effective for the other person.

TIPS FOR SUROGATE TAPPING

Few tips could come in handy while practicing surrogate tapping. 

• Remove yourself from the equation: First, work on your own issues with wanting or needing change in the other person. Simply move out of the way and allow healing to flow through you. This isn't about you or your plans. You are not on a mission to ‘cure' someone. You're merely offering them healing, which they can choose to accept or reject. 
•  Don't dwell on or evaluate anything: Allow yourself to be carried away by the words as they come to you in a stream of consciousness. It's fine if what happens surprises or surprises you; it's also fine if you feel like you're making it up. Allow yourself to act.
• Do not take the initiative or employ overly hopeful reframes: Stick to basic EFT, be specific, and clean up all parts of your life. It hasn't worked with animals when there has been a direct indication of change – leading. Try to recall or picture past occurrences that might explain this behavior or mood.
• Describe the situation: Begin by presenting the tale, the facts, and your sentiments about the other person while tapping on yourself in the third person. That may drive you to create an imaginative dialogue with them as you converse with them, allowing some silences for responses and allowing yourself to pretend or make it up again. Continue tapping.
• Step back: Relax and don't search for changes to 'show' that tapping worked after you've done it. It's possible that the change you're looking for isn't what you expected.

HOW DOES SURROGATE TAPPING WORK?

People who are deeply connected to one another may perceive each other's thoughts, feelings, and situations since they are in the same field. hey are linked in an energy field where they can sense each other's emotions and thoughts.

So there are 2 approaches to surrogate tapping:

• One is to the step inside the person and imagine what they are feeling and tap on yourself.
• Other is to describe what might be going on for them as an observer and tap on yourself. 

The steps to the first method is outlined below:

1. Bring the person to your mind

2. Imagine stepping into their body

3. Breathe how they’re breathing

4. Feel how they’re feeling.

5. Then ask yourself, how are they feeling?

6. Tap on yourself as if you are them

Once the tapping is complete, step outside the persons body. Shake yourself off. Take a deep breath.

To others, the idea of tuning in to another person's (or animal's) energy field from afar and mending it with intention may appear unscientific.

However, few of us have really grasped the implications of quantum physics. We're pleased to utilise our smart phones even if we have no idea how they work.

I'm not sure I understand quantum physics well enough to explain how surrogate tapping works.

DOES SURROGATE TAPPING REALLY WORK?

There have been instances where surrogate tapping have showed wonders. Below are few clinical data of the same.

This was live case I did where a couple came to see me because the baby’s urethra and penis were not growing at the same rate and that was causing a lot of friction for the baby while urinating.

The baby was in nappies so any kind of rubbing would cause a lot of discomfort.

The parents sat on either sides and the mother held the baby as the father translated the phrases in Marathi. I asked the mother to hold the baby and tell me how she was feeling about what was going on for the baby.

She described the baby’s experience and we tapped along. At one point, we stopped the baby’s tapping and ended up tapping for the mother as she was getting very anxious.

That was a live example where I noticed baby calming down right in front of our eyes.

This was also a case I worked on with a student of mine who had learnt EFT.

She had a son who was being kicked out of the Swaminarayan School. She came to me for help.

In her case, she was very comfortable stepping in as her son, breathing as her son, feeling as her son, reading as her son and learnt so much about her son in the process and she said “I love him whether they keep him in school or not”.

For me that was the clincher. It meant there is no aspect of fixing and only acceptance and that’s how I knew she is ready to go ahead.

If she had said “I need my son to pass because without a pass it will mean that I am a bad parent, let’s fix it…”, then we wouldn’t be going to do it. She would only tap on her fingers while doing chores, would tap on her fingers as the son –

“Even though I am not feeling so good, I feel like such a failure, I am  so nervous, I am not sure I can pass my exams, I am a not a good student, I love and accept myself “.

She did it informally without sitting in a therapy room. Three months later, he was kept in the school. Later he got into Warwick or LSE for the toughest degree and became very confident.

Once someone starts getting the benefit, empower them to do it for themselves if you can as it is much more powerful.  

There was a client whose husband had a baggage handling business and they would have clients Like Virgin Airway, Air India.

In any of the business meetings they had with clients, her husband would tell her quietly to ‘do that thing’. So, she would begin tapping-

“Even though Virgin Airways is giving us a tough time, suppose somehow we can get the business anyway. Even though we are so unsure ……”

She would to the complete EFT Tapping with selfish intent yet she was doing it from a place of whatever happens, happen. In a way, she was also becoming the decision maker.

She would work on the client’s doubt and concerns while in the meeting, making sure they seal the deal with them and this is how they got the business more than once.

Experimentation and observation, not dogma, are the foundations of science.

Why not try it out for yourself and see what happens?

If surrogate tapping works (and I believe most people can do it successfully with a little effort), it's a fantastic way to get our healing work out into the world.

Stay blessed and keep tapping.

Love,

Dr Rangana Rupavi Choudhuri (PhD)

PS: To learn many such techniques taught at the EFT seminar, join one and help yourself and your loved ones. Here's the tapping sequence I used to get rid of my frustration.

In summary, Surrogate EFT Tapping is a highly effective method that can be used in a variety of scenarios. Those who are unable to engage in the normal Tapping procedure can be helped if the purpose is pure and for the highest good. Surrogate tapping can be done in two ways: one is to picture yourself inside the person and tap on yourself, and the other is to describe what might be going on for them as an observer and tap on yourself.

References:

1. Don't bottle up your emotions- It'll knock years off your life and raise cancer risk by 70 percent - The daily mail UK, article by Pat Hagan
2. The link between cancer and unexpressed anger - Psycho-oncology
3. Tantrum Tapping - Blog, How important is energy? 3 daily exercises to boost yours
4. Generalized anxiety disorder – The Mayo clinic
5. Cortisol and anxiety reference  - The Effect of Emotional Freedom Techniques on Stress Biochemistry: A Randomized Controlled Trial, Church Dawson PhD ^*Yount, Garret PhD^†; Brooks, Audrey J. PhD^‡ Journal of Nervous & Mental Disease
6. Psychological Trauma in Veterans using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques): A Randomized Controlled Trial, Church, Hawk, Brooks et. al. 
7. Forgiveness – your health depends on it, John Hopkins Institute